What is an end-of-life doula?
As an end of life doula, I am here to help you, your loved ones, and those who support you, navigate the issues that arise as you turn to face the challenges that come up at the end of life, and the decisions that need to be made.
My practice is focused on being someone who is easy to tap with questions that range from the nuts and bolts of what kind of paperwork is needed to make sure your wishes are followed, to thinking about how you want to live this last part of your life, or what legacy you want to leave.
I am here to be the sounding board as you take in the changes to your health and contemplate what is most meaningful to you. In all of this, my role is not to judge or bring you to a certain conclusion, but to be a bridge back to yourself, to help you clarify what you believe and value and want to focus on and how to meet the challenges that arise.
Why a doula?
People seek out an end-of-life doula because something in their life has called them to confront their own mortality.
It may be you are noticing your own or a loved one’s aging process, or you may have just been given a diagnosis of a serious or life threatening illness, and this has prompted you to think about your death. Whatever the circumstances, one thing remains common; this last part of our life most often comes with very little preparation and a lot of fear and taboo against talking about it.
My role as a doula is to be your emotional, spiritual, and nuts and bolts resource, providing you with support and information so you can live this part of your life as you envision it. I see myself as and end of life navigator, helping my clients find their way through what can feel like an overwhelming combination of emotions, spiritual questions and paperwork.
How does this work?
Each person’s situation and needs are unique. If you are just beginning to think about the end of life and want to begin planning, we can meet once and go over the basic things you need to have in place to ensure that your wishes are followed. But we can also meet on a weekly basis, or as often as you think is helpful, to talk about what is coming up for you as you take in the changes due to illness and aging, to create legacy projects, to support your caregivers and family/friends, to sit vigil or offer quiet presence, and to support loved ones with your after death care.
Depending on your preference and where you are located, I offer home visits or visits through Zoom. I serve all of Berkshire County, Massachusetts, and western Columbia County, New York.
If you have Hospice, doulas and Hospice often work hand in hand. Hospice provides medical services that a doula cannot, and a doula can provide the personalized help that is becoming difficult for Hospice to provide due to health insurance restrictions.
I have a per visit fee that varies depending on where you live (how far I travel) and what you are able to pay. Money can be a hard thing to talk about, but I feel strongly that there is always a way that is fair and affordable and cost should not prevent you from accessing my services.
About me...
My name is Pamela Shad. I live in southern Berkshire County. I earned my End-of-Life Doula certification from the Larner College of Medicine at the University of Vermont. I have an MSW from Yeshiva University and worked as a Hospice social worker for over 20 years, making home visits as well as nursing home and hospital visits.
I have 1 ½ years of training with the New York Zen Center for Contemplative care as a non-denominational chaplain, and worked as a chaplain at Beth Israel hospital in NYC on the ICU, telemetry, and head and neck surgery units. I am also a certified teacher for MBSR, a type of meditation practice developed at UMass Medical Center as a way to help people cope with the symptoms of chronic illness. I have my own religious/spiritual practice that I lean on but also a firm belief that the religious or spiritual practice that is best is the one that feels right for each person, the one that feels like it is bringing you home, whether that is a traditional religion, something unique to you or none at all.
Get In Touch
If you have any questions or would like to discuss how I might support you and your loved ones, please feel free to reach out.